Are you happy?

[Lynn]

It's safe to assume that the majority of us single moms didn't dream of being single moms. It's really not the most desirable life aspiration. We probably all had the white-picket-fence fantasy of a happy marriage and intact family, and may have even endured miserable marriages longer than we should have because it was so hard to let go of that dream -- and those great vacations! But now that we are raising our children on our own, without much help from the ex-husband, I wonder . . . are you happy? I can tell you with 100% certainty that I am much, much happier now than when I was married. I'm not saying it's easy. My life is oftentimes fraught with stress. But the fact that I am living in truth and no longer have to pretend to be in love with someone I simply don't like, well, it's liberating and joyful, all at once.

[Katherine]

This is definitely a yes and no question. Yes, because I am blessed with a beautiful little boy, and I am thankful every single day of my life for the gift I have been given to be his mother. And yes also because I have lovely friends and only an occasionally-crazy family who love and support us. But sometimes no when I'm tired and I feel alone, and I wonder if I'll ever find love again and be able to feel like love can even exist after the loss of innocence and trust and love I experienced when my husband left us.

[Lynn]

Katherine,

I understand how alone you can feel sometimes. Especially on a Friday night when the kids are off at their dad's and the only time the phone rings is when Blockbuster is reminding you that the movie you rented is overdue. It's an emotional cocktail being a single mom: You can be angry, sad, disillusioned, depressed, lonely and at times despondent. But what's also mixed into that pity party is a deep appreciation for what really does matter -- your children. Yes, Katherine, your ex was a real shit for leaving you with a newborn. But that was his parting gift. You'll have to admit that having your son to love and guide through life makes all the heartache from that marriage worth it, doesn't it? And as a woman raising a little man, you have an opportunity to make the future a little better for other women by teaching him to honor his obligations so that he won't repeat the sins of his father someday and abandon his family. You really are in a great place right now. Be strong. Be happy. And in time, the right man will come along again. Or even the right wrong man . . . ;)